My baby is 3 months old! No longer a newborn and the 4th trimester is over. I’ve really embraced the 4th trimester with Felix in a way I don’t think I allowed myself to with Violet and Ezra. As difficult as those newborn days are, they have been precious and a privilege. I’ve not wished any of it away (even the cluster feed which only ended at 5am!). I’ve just gone with Felix’s flow. He has shown me the way and together we are through the haze about to start a new chapter in his development.
Felix has grown. And grown. And grown! His newborn sparrow legs now have glorious rolls. His cheeks have filled and his wrists have that adorable chubby crease! He’s jumped up a percentile line (or 2!) and I can certainly feel his weight in my arms. Despite being my smallest baby at birth he has filled out the quickest.
Felix is loving his milk and I’m utterly thrilled that it’s all from me. During the pregnancy Joe asked me what type of baby I would like. Aside from the wishes for him to be happy and healthy I said I’d love a baby who just ‘gets’ breastfeeding. My wish came true! After so much heartache, complications and frustrations with Violet and Ezra and our breastfeeding journeys, Felix really does ‘get it’. I have to confess that I do love feeding him. I look forward to each feed and I enjoy having that enforced break to just sit with Felix and take a breather. Feeds are quicker now however he does enjoy staying on the breast for comfort.
As convenient as breastfeeding is, it’s a big undertaking for me and has taken me away from Violet and Ezra. Joe is doing most of their care when he is around while I sit and feed/comfort Felix. We have had some trying times with Violet and especially Ezra’s bedtime over the last couple of months. And it’s fallen on Joe’s shoulders to deal with the upset. I do have guilt over this however we both want Felix to be breastfed (as long as it’s working well) so the challenges are something we have had to accept. It doesn’t last forever and without wanting to jinx anything, I think we are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.
I wondered whether Felix would be the spitting image of his big brother. For a few weeks there did seem to be many similarities. However now I look at him and I do think he will have a face all of his own. His eyes are much bigger and blue whereas Ezra’s are green. He also has chubbier cheeks and much less hair. It will be great to compare some photos in a few months time.
Nights with Felix are OK. He isn’t an amazing sleeper but I cannot say he is bad by any stretch of the imagination. He goes to bed when I go to bed and sleeps 2-4 hours. Then he has a feed and goes back in his bed for 2-3 hours. The second night feed I struggle to have the energy to sit up so I tend to bring him into bed with me and feed him laying down. That’s how we spend the rest of the night. Cuddling, sleeping and feeding. I actually love it which is something I never thought I would say about cosleeping! I really hope he starts pulling out longer stretches of sleep soon….
Felix is very ticklish. Even putting his arms in his vests and gro makes him squirm. He is so close to laughing – I’m waiting for that sound impatiently.
Felix loves to be held and cuddled. He isn’t keen on being on the playmat or in the swing. He will just about tolerate his bouncy chair if you get him in the right mood. So it’s certainly not easy holding him all the time while trying to sort out a 4 and 2 year old! I know this phase is short lived though. In a few months time he will have much more interest in toys, his siblings and the world around him. I tell myself that as difficult as this is right now, it’s a very brief moment. Enjoy the cuddles.
Life with 3 young children is far from easy. Felix has put a little spanner in the works and we are finding our new balance. But he is a total darling. He is the little boy who was missing from our family and now we are lucky enough to have him with us. I look forward to another 3 months of growth, development and making more memories with the littlest member of our family!